Parenting plans

The basics of parenting plans

One of the most important things to understand is how parenting arrangements are defined under Ontario law. While people often still say “custody” and “access,” these terms have been replaced in the law by “parenting decision-making responsibility” and “parenting time.”

Parenting Decision Making Responsibility (formerly known as “Custody”) refers to decision-making responsibility for a child—not where the child(ren) live. This includes major life decisions such as:

• where a child attends school
• what language the child is raised in
• medical and health decisions

If one parent has sole Parenting Decision-Making Responsibility, that parent is responsible for making these significant decisions.

If parents share joint Decision-Making Responsibility, both parents have equal responsibility and authority to make those decisions together.

Decision-Making Responsibility is ultimately about who has the rights and responsibilities to make decisions in a child’s best interests.

Parenting Time (formerly known as “Access”) refers to the right to spend time parenting the child, and to be given information about the child.

Both parents are entitled to receive information about their child’s health, education and overall well-being.

In most situations, when both people are sound and responsible parents, shared decision-making is considered appropriate.

Separation and its impact on children

Research shows that the most difficult part of separation for children is conflict between their parents. When parents are hostile toward one another, children are more likely to experience emotional harm.

Reducing conflict and maintaining respectful communication play an important role in supporting a child’s well-being during separation.

How decision-making responsibility decisions are made

Most parenting arrangements are decided by parents themselves through:

• informal negotiation
• mediation
• the collaborative process
• lawyer-assisted negotiation
• or a combination of these approaches

Only a small number of cases require a judge to decide parenting arrangements through court.

Court proceedings can be expensive, disruptive and emotionally demanding. If each parent hires a lawyer for litigation, they could each expect to pay a minimum of $20,000 in legal fees. Mediation or collaborative law are often more cost-effective options when parents are unable to reach agreement on their own.

Creating a parenting plan

Even when parents agree on decision-making responsibility, the parenting plan — meaning how much access each parent has — requires careful planning and attention to detail.

A parenting plan typically includes:

• a regular parenting schedule (often based on a two-week cycle)
• major holidays throughout the year
• Mother’s Day and Father’s Day
• school holidays and summer vacation
• children’s birthdays and parents’ birthdays
• important family or cultural events

Parents also need to address practical matters such as passports, travel permissions and any specific needs their child may have.

When parents cannot agree

If parents are unable to agree on parenting arrangements, additional professional support may help.

Within the collaborative process, parents can jointly retain a family relations professional. These professionals are usually trained in social work or child development and help parents resolve parenting issues. They are not lawyers.

In court proceedings, parents may instead retain a parenting evaluator, who conducts a formal assessment and provides recommendations. This process can be considerably more expensive.

Parenting assumptions in Ontario

There is no standard or automatic parenting schedule in Ontario. Parenting arrangements are determined based on one guiding principle: the best interests of the child.

Courts and professionals consider many factors when assessing a child’s needs, including:

• the relationship between each parent and the child
• the child’s views and preferences (depending on age and maturity)
• how long the child has lived in a stable environment
• each parent’s ability to provide guidance, education and daily care
• each parent’s plan for the child’s future care
• the stability of each parent’s home environment
• the child’s relationship with parents by birth or adoption

Every parenting plan is unique because every child and family situation is different.